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Judaism

Kol Nidre

In the age of COVID, High Holiday services have largely moved online. In order to combat Zoom-bombings and other internet woes, most congregations have been offering their holiday services via livestream on YouTube. Tonight, as I tuned into the Kol Nidre service of my congregation I noticed YouTube giving me suggestions to other congregation’s livestreams.

This got me thinking. Suddenly, I had a opportunity to peek in on the services of communities around the world with just a few clicks. I clicked on the first suggestion YouTube gave me, which was a congregation in New York City boasting over 1500 viewers. My home congregation had around 550 which I thought was rather impressive, but over 1500 was a different level. This then tipped me off on another idea. There’s one congregation in New York that pre-COVID I’d thought I’d like to visit one day.

Central Synagogue in Midtown Manhattan.

Not only in Central Synagogue a thriving reform congregation in New York, but the senior rabbi is Angela Warnick Buchdahl. Rabbi Buchdahl was the first Asian-American to be ordained a rabbi – and she’s Korean.

I actually met Rabbi Buchdahl when she was in rabbinical school and I was in high school. When I met her, she was the first Asian Jewish adult I had ever seen. I was speechless. During our brief visit with her, I never spoke to her, but I’ve always remembered what that felt like to see someone who looked like me. It was some sort of combination of shock and awe.

Fast-forward two decades and I’m sitting in my house, laptop on my lap, headphones on, and in two clicks, I’m watching the beginning of Rabbi Buchdahl’s Kol Nidre sermon. It starts off with her talking about always being asked if she was Jewish and the constant doubt and skepticism that has and continues to surround her within the Jewish community. And you know what? I felt seen. Her experiences are my experiences. And she’s the senior rabbi and a huge congregation, broadcasting these thoughts to thousands of people.

Watching her speak about the systematic racism of our country and within our religion brought actual tears to my eyes. Sitting by myself, listening to someone who doesn’t know me at all, share things about herself that I relate to in such a pure and direct way dug deep.

When you hear that representation matters, know that it matters. For the first time in thirty-six years, I really felt it. Because for the first time in thirty-six years, I was finally represented.

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